Friday, January 29, 2010
So is the youngest child always going to be raised differently than the other children?
As I was thinking today about demanding maturity and appropriate age expectations, I began to think about my own parents and the way they treat their children....and I can definitely say the youngest has been raised much differently than the first child, ME! i don't say this in a bad way because I see this in just about every family. As time goes on parents maybe have more money, time and resources to care for their younger children. Parents are older and more experienced by the time they raise their younger children. They have already raised a few children so they maybe believe what they have done in the past is sufficient and no longer feel the need to implement some of the things for their youngest that they did for their oldest. Is it that parents take their knowledge and experience from raising their previous children for granted? Do they forget their vision that they had for their first child or do they have the same one?
It also seems to me like the youngest grows up a lot faster because they associate with older siblings that have paved the way before them. The youngest might have higher expectations because of their older siblings or they could be lower. I think maybe parents become more lax because they have the older children to set examples for the younger ones...there isn't as much direct teaching but more comparison and referencing to what has worked in the past. Is this making any sense?
I am just trying to figure out why this is and also, why is it that middle children sometimes get more neglected?
I am in a group dynamics class this semester for my major and so I often think about the dynamics of a family and what it does for individual members and the effect it has on the group as a whole. Maybe it is just something you must learn from experience...like actually having a family and witnessing the variety of personalities, talents, and aptitudes that they each bring with them....but as with all things, their ARE certain patterns families and parents must follow to be able to raise a successful family.